It's my last day of work before I'm off for 10 days. 4pm. Want. To. Go. Home.
I have changed my voicemail greeting. I have changed my out of office assistant on outlook.
I have replied to all of my emails. Completed my "to do" list. Had lunch with the majority of the staff. Had one meeting. I think everyone is just watching the clock tick down to 5pm.
So, here are some random things about me that you probably couldn't care less about.
1) Most of my friends already know this, but I can't stand the word "moist". At. All. Like, it's even hard for me to type it.
2) I have never broken a bone.
3) I have a very deep fear of enclosed spaces and I need to be sedated when getting an MRI or PET scan.
4) I have to sleep with a white noise machine or fan. I panic slightly if I'm sleeping somewhere like a hotel or someone else's house. Jimm will never forget when we were staying in a hotel and I discovered a box fan in the closet & acted like I found a suitcase full of money.
5) I pick at the skin around my fingernails on my thumbs until they bleed. Stress= very bad habit, I know. I'm a therapist, remember?
6) I have traveled to about 13 different countries...maybe more. Not sure, I lost count somewhere along the way. But I also haven't been back out of the country since my honeymoon over six years ago. That's what kids will do to ya :-)
7) Canada and Mexico are not part of the 13 different countries I have been to.
8) I have never read nor watched Twilight or Harry Potter and nor do I care to. Zero interest.
9) I did not grow up playing any card game except for Uno, so if I play a card game I have to pay serious attention because I get confused about the ranking/order of the face cards.
10) I can usually recall where I have seen an actor or actress before but if I can't I rely on IMDB to refresh my memory and then I have an "aha" moment.
11) I don't really swim. I have a great fear of deep water...meaning over 5 feet deep. :-) But I have tried to water ski, I have been tubing several times and I have also gone parasailing. I will also go in boats as long as I have a life jacket on or nearby. Oh, I also went snorkeling....sort of. I didn't venture out too far.
12) I only like white Christmas lights. Nothing against the multi-colored lights, I just like the look of the white, with green garland and red bows.
13) Diet Pepsi.
14) Jimm and I do not officially have a "freebie" list but if we did I would probably put Bradley Cooper and Adam Levine at the top of the list. And my husband knows this. He actually will let me know when one of them is on TV and let's me gawk. But he also knows that he is the only love of my life ....which is why I think he is actually laughing at me as I gawk at them :-)
15) I can't stand when people say "eX-specially" instead of eSpecially. Or eXpresso instead of eSpresso. It sometimes affects my opinion about their intelligence.
16) If I see guacamole or avocado on a menu I will usually order the meal that it is a part of.
17) I don't like steak.
18) I am a music geek. I have played the piano since I was in first grade and actually took lessons at a conservatory for quite some time.
19) I am a sap at heart and love cheesy romantic comedies. Much to Jimm's dismay.
20) But I also love quirky, bloody, violent movies such as The Usual Suspects and The Departed.
There you go. It's almost time to go home! Merry Christmas and Happy New Year!
Thursday, December 22, 2011
Monday, December 19, 2011
Through Our Children's Eyes
innocence.
discovery.
excitement.
joy.
fun.
As they watched the snow fall quickly from the sky their little voices raised higher in pitch and their excited talk became squeals of delight. Snow angels! My new shovel! My new snow pants! SNOW! SNOW!
Walking into the zoo their play by play commentaries crack their parents up. Running ahead, looking at their maps they shout "wow, they did a really good job decorating!". "Look at the decorations!" "Wow, look at the lights!". "Let's go see the dolphins!" "We're right here by all of the Christmas trees!". "Let's run in the snow!"
The youngest sits quietly looking around and then shouts "Ohhhhhhh", "SNOW", waving her arms around frantically encouraging daddy to catch up to the boys.
None of them notice the crowds, the annoyed parents, the fact that some are angry about the "Happy Holiday's" signs- They are just experiencing joy. Pure, innocent, uninhibited adventures.
Each day counting down by adding ornaments to our Jesse tree/Advent tree. Reiterating the story of Jesus' birth and the people who paved the way for His life. Understanding what Christmas is about with their own amazing interpretations.
Listening. Taking it in. Appreciating.
Through the eyes of our Children.
discovery.
excitement.
joy.
fun.
As they watched the snow fall quickly from the sky their little voices raised higher in pitch and their excited talk became squeals of delight. Snow angels! My new shovel! My new snow pants! SNOW! SNOW!
Walking into the zoo their play by play commentaries crack their parents up. Running ahead, looking at their maps they shout "wow, they did a really good job decorating!". "Look at the decorations!" "Wow, look at the lights!". "Let's go see the dolphins!" "We're right here by all of the Christmas trees!". "Let's run in the snow!"
The youngest sits quietly looking around and then shouts "Ohhhhhhh", "SNOW", waving her arms around frantically encouraging daddy to catch up to the boys.
None of them notice the crowds, the annoyed parents, the fact that some are angry about the "Happy Holiday's" signs- They are just experiencing joy. Pure, innocent, uninhibited adventures.
Each day counting down by adding ornaments to our Jesse tree/Advent tree. Reiterating the story of Jesus' birth and the people who paved the way for His life. Understanding what Christmas is about with their own amazing interpretations.
Listening. Taking it in. Appreciating.
Through the eyes of our Children.
Monday, December 12, 2011
Do you Believe in Miracles?
I do. I believe that God still performs and works miracles in today's age. Sometimes they are small and may go unnoticed by most. But I feel that I am one of God's walking miracles.
After my surgery in 2007 the doctor's told my dad, brother and husband out in the hospital waiting room that if the cancer had spread to my lymph nodes they would have given me maybe 3-4 years to live tops. Those doctors were fully expecting to find that the cancer had spread to my lymph nodes because of how big the tumor was and how advanced the cancer was. I was diagnosed at Stage 3.
I remember receiving a telephone call in my hospital room the evening after my surgery and it was from the nurse who had assisted during my surgery. He told me that he was out celebrating with his friends on my behalf because he never would have expected to get the incredible results that they received after testing the lymph nodes. He also knew that I was a brand new mother and that I needed to hear that a miracle had been performed. I have no idea if that nurse was a Christian or not, but he understood what he had seen, heard and witnessed.
I did not know what my family had been told out in that waiting room until quite a few weeks later. They didn't feel it was necessary to tell me and worry me until we absolutely knew that we were on the right track toward getting rid of this horrible cancer. When they told me that news I sat in shock and then tears streamed down my face as I looked at my little newborn boy thinking about how much I would have missed out on in his life as his mommy.
______________________________________
I am begging and pleading with you today to join with me in prayer for two situations. They both need a miracle. And I believe that God will perform them if it is meant to be.
My friend Stacy is currently 26 weeks pregnant. She and her husband Jon just found out that their baby boy is in heart failure. It is too early to deliver him as his little heart is too small and too weak. But doctors fear that his situation is only going to worsen. Do you believe in Miracles? Stacy and Jon are Christians who do. Please pray for them and their little boy.
Jimm's cousin, Michelle and her husband John are the parents of six children. They live in southern Illinois and John was recently transferred down to St. Louis after doctor's found a large tumor on his frontal lobe. They are completing a detailed MRI today to find out what course of treatment will be needed and if the tumor is, in fact, malignant. Michelle is with John in St. Louis and Michelle's parents (Jimm's aunt and uncle) are now down in southern Illinois taking care of the six children. Please pray for John, Michelle and the entire family as they go through these tests and are presented with information and treatment options. Pray for a MIRACLE for this family. Michelle and John are also Christians and I know that they believe in miracles.
A miracle often denotes an event attributed to divine intervention. -Wikipedia.
After my surgery in 2007 the doctor's told my dad, brother and husband out in the hospital waiting room that if the cancer had spread to my lymph nodes they would have given me maybe 3-4 years to live tops. Those doctors were fully expecting to find that the cancer had spread to my lymph nodes because of how big the tumor was and how advanced the cancer was. I was diagnosed at Stage 3.
I remember receiving a telephone call in my hospital room the evening after my surgery and it was from the nurse who had assisted during my surgery. He told me that he was out celebrating with his friends on my behalf because he never would have expected to get the incredible results that they received after testing the lymph nodes. He also knew that I was a brand new mother and that I needed to hear that a miracle had been performed. I have no idea if that nurse was a Christian or not, but he understood what he had seen, heard and witnessed.
I did not know what my family had been told out in that waiting room until quite a few weeks later. They didn't feel it was necessary to tell me and worry me until we absolutely knew that we were on the right track toward getting rid of this horrible cancer. When they told me that news I sat in shock and then tears streamed down my face as I looked at my little newborn boy thinking about how much I would have missed out on in his life as his mommy.
______________________________________
I am begging and pleading with you today to join with me in prayer for two situations. They both need a miracle. And I believe that God will perform them if it is meant to be.
My friend Stacy is currently 26 weeks pregnant. She and her husband Jon just found out that their baby boy is in heart failure. It is too early to deliver him as his little heart is too small and too weak. But doctors fear that his situation is only going to worsen. Do you believe in Miracles? Stacy and Jon are Christians who do. Please pray for them and their little boy.
Jimm's cousin, Michelle and her husband John are the parents of six children. They live in southern Illinois and John was recently transferred down to St. Louis after doctor's found a large tumor on his frontal lobe. They are completing a detailed MRI today to find out what course of treatment will be needed and if the tumor is, in fact, malignant. Michelle is with John in St. Louis and Michelle's parents (Jimm's aunt and uncle) are now down in southern Illinois taking care of the six children. Please pray for John, Michelle and the entire family as they go through these tests and are presented with information and treatment options. Pray for a MIRACLE for this family. Michelle and John are also Christians and I know that they believe in miracles.
A miracle often denotes an event attributed to divine intervention. -Wikipedia.
Tuesday, December 6, 2011
Happy Holidays!
I recently read a blog post by someone that explored the whole "Happy Holidays" versus "Merry Christmas" war; you know, don't take "Christ" out of "Christmas" and keep saying Merry Christmas instead of Happy Holidays.
I really liked what she had to say and I wanted to jot down my feelings on it too.
I believe that the saying "Happy Holidays" originated not to eliminate or get rid of Christmas, but to combine Thanksgiving, Christmas and New Years Eve ....Happy Holidays (more than one and all inclusive if you will). And also to be sensitive to those of the Jewish faith who don't celebrate Christmas (amongst other faiths). It was not to take Christ out of Christmas, merely another alternative saying to celebrate the holiday season no matter what faith you were (or were not).
I think if we get too hung up on this, we will continue to alienate those non-Christians who already think that ALL Christians are wacky, right-wing, judgemental, intolerant, stingy and non-compassionate people.
Instead, maybe just go with the flow and if someone says "Happy Holidays" to you, take it for what it is: a stranger, friend or acquaintance being NICE. Don't go into some long diatribe about how you only say Merry Christmas because you believe that Christmas is Jesus' birthday (which really isn't even December 25th, but I won't go into that part of the argument....) and that you don't want to take the Christ out of Christmas. Because then what did you do? Make the person feel like an idiot for trying to be NICE and wish you happiness?
I also don't think there's anything wrong with trying to be sensitive to the fact that not everyone celebrates certain holidays. I know some Christian faith denominations that do not celebrate Christmas, Easter, birthdays, etc. And I've heard the reasons and arguments behind this and think that there is definitely some relevance to be considered.
What is it saying about Christians if we are the ones who get stuck on saying Merry Christmas and show inflexibility and intolerance for those who might choose to say Happy Holidays instead?
And really, aren't MOST of the traditions on Christmas purely exaggerated American traditions instead of actual Christian rituals? Christmas trees? Santa? Presents? Ok, the wise men brought Jesus presents but do you think that God really wants us to go into debt on Christmas so that we can make our kids happy?
I don't think there's anything wrong with trying to be sensitive or *gasp* politically correct. It's not just about the language or whether Christmas is really Jesus' birthday. But this holiday season can also be a sensitive time for many if they don't have family to celebrate with, or if they are single and wish they were in a relationship, or if a loved one died around this time of year and it brings back very difficult memories.
Maybe we can just be NICE and say "Happy Holidays" back to someone when they say it to us instead of getting upset that they took the Christ out of our Christmas. Because honestly....you're the only one that can do that for yourself.
Happy Holidays People!
I really liked what she had to say and I wanted to jot down my feelings on it too.
I believe that the saying "Happy Holidays" originated not to eliminate or get rid of Christmas, but to combine Thanksgiving, Christmas and New Years Eve ....Happy Holidays (more than one and all inclusive if you will). And also to be sensitive to those of the Jewish faith who don't celebrate Christmas (amongst other faiths). It was not to take Christ out of Christmas, merely another alternative saying to celebrate the holiday season no matter what faith you were (or were not).
I think if we get too hung up on this, we will continue to alienate those non-Christians who already think that ALL Christians are wacky, right-wing, judgemental, intolerant, stingy and non-compassionate people.
Instead, maybe just go with the flow and if someone says "Happy Holidays" to you, take it for what it is: a stranger, friend or acquaintance being NICE. Don't go into some long diatribe about how you only say Merry Christmas because you believe that Christmas is Jesus' birthday (which really isn't even December 25th, but I won't go into that part of the argument....) and that you don't want to take the Christ out of Christmas. Because then what did you do? Make the person feel like an idiot for trying to be NICE and wish you happiness?
I also don't think there's anything wrong with trying to be sensitive to the fact that not everyone celebrates certain holidays. I know some Christian faith denominations that do not celebrate Christmas, Easter, birthdays, etc. And I've heard the reasons and arguments behind this and think that there is definitely some relevance to be considered.
What is it saying about Christians if we are the ones who get stuck on saying Merry Christmas and show inflexibility and intolerance for those who might choose to say Happy Holidays instead?
And really, aren't MOST of the traditions on Christmas purely exaggerated American traditions instead of actual Christian rituals? Christmas trees? Santa? Presents? Ok, the wise men brought Jesus presents but do you think that God really wants us to go into debt on Christmas so that we can make our kids happy?
I don't think there's anything wrong with trying to be sensitive or *gasp* politically correct. It's not just about the language or whether Christmas is really Jesus' birthday. But this holiday season can also be a sensitive time for many if they don't have family to celebrate with, or if they are single and wish they were in a relationship, or if a loved one died around this time of year and it brings back very difficult memories.
Maybe we can just be NICE and say "Happy Holidays" back to someone when they say it to us instead of getting upset that they took the Christ out of our Christmas. Because honestly....you're the only one that can do that for yourself.
Happy Holidays People!
Wednesday, November 23, 2011
Being Grateful Admist the Busy-ness
As you can tell the ramblings become more sporadic for this working mom as the busy-ness ensues. I usually do my blogging on my "down time" at work and well, I haven't really had that lately.
And even now, at this current moment I am blogging only because I am avoiding working on our training submissions to the lovely Department of Children and Family Services for approval. The more mundane and boring part of my job.
But overall, I couldn't be happier at my job. The past few months have been a whirlwind of trainings and workshops. But all were highly successful and we are slowly but surely getting our name out there as a force to be reckoned with in the post adoption world. Come here for services and you will get an earful. Just ask my friends who are currently going through the process :-)
Oh, and I got interviewed by a local newspaper about adoption. My words were not quoted exactly as I said them. I wouldn't normally say "putting your child up for adoption"; I actually said "placing your child for adoption" but I'm not going to hung up on the language when our message got out there and our services were advertised. http://www.mysuburbanlife.com/lemont/features/x1821248175/Lemont-couple-teaches-early-on-there-s-no-shame-in-adoption
But besides work, us Shepard's are keeping busy. We are moving forward with applying for loans and working on obtaining a real estate agent so that we can "move our cheese" in the near future. We still don't know exactly where we will be moving to, but it will be west and north of where we are now. We just need some more SPACE!
Ethan received his first trophy for his participation in soccer. He was beyond ecstatic. He told me that he got the trophy for "his first kick". So cute.
Reese is now 16 months old and is off the charts height-wise. I was at the library recently and asked another mother how old her son was and he was two months older than Reese but a good inch shorter than her :-) She is also talking up a storm. And perfecting tantrums.
We battled through 2 rounds of the flu at our house and now Jimm is on to a sore throat and cough. It's been awesome. Ha.
We're excited about some upcoming school and church holiday activities! Ethan will be on the wise men in the church play along with his best friend Graham. Reese will be singing "Away in a Manger". Can't wait to see if they actually get up on stage! Ethan's school will also be doing a little production and the 4 year olds usually have bigger parts. Not sure if Ethan has any speaking parts yet, but I'm not holding my breath. I can certainly see that my girl will be the ham in the family and not my son :-)
We are also going on the Polar Express train ride in a few weeks. We tried to get tickets last year and they were sold out so this year I got them several months in advance. Polar Express or "Magic Train" as Ethan calls the movie is one of his favorites. He will watch it at any time during the year, so I'm very excited to see his face when we do this!
I'm NOT looking forward to putting up a tree this year. My nosy, curious 16 month old is squashing my excitement about this. Trying to figure out the best way to deal with the hands-i-ness of my little stinker.
With Thanksgiving creeping up....as in tomorrow....I am aware of so many things in my life to be grateful for:
My husband who is also a wonderful father.
My incredibly cute, talented and gifted children.
Our families who continually amaze me in regards to their generosity with our kids, especially my mother for watching them 3 days a week.
The close and incredibly fun friendships that we have developed through our church. And the crazy connections that we have made through those friendships. God works in amazing ways.
Our friend Hannah who watches our kids the other 2 days a week while we both work full time. The kids feel completely comfortable with her and we've got a pretty nice routine down now. Of course now she's going to go and mess it up by wanting to adopt a baby soon :-)
The amazing friendship that we have developed with Danny and Andrea (and they also want to adopt a baby!), who also happen to be the parents of Ethan's best friend, Graham. We also happen to live next door to her grandpa, down the street from her parents, around the corner from her brothers and a few of her aunts. We like to keep things all in the family, ya know.
My husband's business has really taken off this year (now called Fidei Group, Inc.) and we are fortunate that his business partners are good friends of ours and I am also proud to call their wives my good friends!
A church that not only embraces Jesus, Home and Others First, but also reaches out to the community and the world by taking up intiatives such as providing clean water for those that don't have it and assisting Abolition International in the fight against Human Trafficking.
Friends who put up with my liberal political views even though they may not agree with my opinions.
The incredible freedom that I have by being a U.S. citizen and the men and women who make that happen.
My health. Knocking on wood, I will be cancer free in June of 2012 for 5 YEARS!
The health of my friends and family. I will never take that for granted after battling cancer. Never.
My awesome job and the people I work with.
And they already made it on the list....but I have to say again how thankful I am to be a mama to 2 of the most adorable, fun, crazy kids ever. My love for them just gets stronger with every minute of every day.
Happy Thanksgiving!
And even now, at this current moment I am blogging only because I am avoiding working on our training submissions to the lovely Department of Children and Family Services for approval. The more mundane and boring part of my job.
But overall, I couldn't be happier at my job. The past few months have been a whirlwind of trainings and workshops. But all were highly successful and we are slowly but surely getting our name out there as a force to be reckoned with in the post adoption world. Come here for services and you will get an earful. Just ask my friends who are currently going through the process :-)
Oh, and I got interviewed by a local newspaper about adoption. My words were not quoted exactly as I said them. I wouldn't normally say "putting your child up for adoption"; I actually said "placing your child for adoption" but I'm not going to hung up on the language when our message got out there and our services were advertised. http://www.mysuburbanlife.com/lemont/features/x1821248175/Lemont-couple-teaches-early-on-there-s-no-shame-in-adoption
But besides work, us Shepard's are keeping busy. We are moving forward with applying for loans and working on obtaining a real estate agent so that we can "move our cheese" in the near future. We still don't know exactly where we will be moving to, but it will be west and north of where we are now. We just need some more SPACE!
Ethan received his first trophy for his participation in soccer. He was beyond ecstatic. He told me that he got the trophy for "his first kick". So cute.
Reese is now 16 months old and is off the charts height-wise. I was at the library recently and asked another mother how old her son was and he was two months older than Reese but a good inch shorter than her :-) She is also talking up a storm. And perfecting tantrums.
We battled through 2 rounds of the flu at our house and now Jimm is on to a sore throat and cough. It's been awesome. Ha.
We're excited about some upcoming school and church holiday activities! Ethan will be on the wise men in the church play along with his best friend Graham. Reese will be singing "Away in a Manger". Can't wait to see if they actually get up on stage! Ethan's school will also be doing a little production and the 4 year olds usually have bigger parts. Not sure if Ethan has any speaking parts yet, but I'm not holding my breath. I can certainly see that my girl will be the ham in the family and not my son :-)
We are also going on the Polar Express train ride in a few weeks. We tried to get tickets last year and they were sold out so this year I got them several months in advance. Polar Express or "Magic Train" as Ethan calls the movie is one of his favorites. He will watch it at any time during the year, so I'm very excited to see his face when we do this!
I'm NOT looking forward to putting up a tree this year. My nosy, curious 16 month old is squashing my excitement about this. Trying to figure out the best way to deal with the hands-i-ness of my little stinker.
With Thanksgiving creeping up....as in tomorrow....I am aware of so many things in my life to be grateful for:
My husband who is also a wonderful father.
My incredibly cute, talented and gifted children.
Our families who continually amaze me in regards to their generosity with our kids, especially my mother for watching them 3 days a week.
The close and incredibly fun friendships that we have developed through our church. And the crazy connections that we have made through those friendships. God works in amazing ways.
Our friend Hannah who watches our kids the other 2 days a week while we both work full time. The kids feel completely comfortable with her and we've got a pretty nice routine down now. Of course now she's going to go and mess it up by wanting to adopt a baby soon :-)
The amazing friendship that we have developed with Danny and Andrea (and they also want to adopt a baby!), who also happen to be the parents of Ethan's best friend, Graham. We also happen to live next door to her grandpa, down the street from her parents, around the corner from her brothers and a few of her aunts. We like to keep things all in the family, ya know.
My husband's business has really taken off this year (now called Fidei Group, Inc.) and we are fortunate that his business partners are good friends of ours and I am also proud to call their wives my good friends!
A church that not only embraces Jesus, Home and Others First, but also reaches out to the community and the world by taking up intiatives such as providing clean water for those that don't have it and assisting Abolition International in the fight against Human Trafficking.
Friends who put up with my liberal political views even though they may not agree with my opinions.
The incredible freedom that I have by being a U.S. citizen and the men and women who make that happen.
My health. Knocking on wood, I will be cancer free in June of 2012 for 5 YEARS!
The health of my friends and family. I will never take that for granted after battling cancer. Never.
My awesome job and the people I work with.
And they already made it on the list....but I have to say again how thankful I am to be a mama to 2 of the most adorable, fun, crazy kids ever. My love for them just gets stronger with every minute of every day.
Happy Thanksgiving!
Thursday, November 3, 2011
Dear Glee;
I decided that I would not jump on the bandwagon of signing a petition regarding your recent adoption storyline until we could see where things were going.
Ending the last show with Quinn declaring that she was going to "get her baby back. full custody" left me with my typical "really" feeling that I often have when shows and movies try to depict an adoption story line. But again, I decided I would give it a chance.
And then we had this week's episode. In which you made Quinn look like an idiot birthmother. Hiding hot sauce, baby sacrificing books and other paraphenalia around the house that was supposed to make the adoptive mother (who...by the way...is also Rachel's birthmother....but that's another story) look "unfit". Puh-lease.
But perhaps my favorite line was when Quinn told Puck (the birthfather) that she called child protective services and "they were backed up but they should have the baby back in a couple of weeks". WHA?????
What does that even mean? There are so many things wrong with that statement I don't even know where to begin! Why would child protective services take a call from a high schooler and just take her word that the adoptive mother is unfit? And even if they were going to do an investigation and find her unfit, why in the world would they place the baby back with the birthmother when she VOLUNTARILY relinquished her rights. ARRRRGGGGHHHH.
They COULD have done so much more with this on a real, in depth level. They could have explored how difficult it is to place your baby for adoption and the heartache, grief and regret that one might feel after they have made that choice. I would have been fine with that. Because it's absolutely true.
And then the kicker at the end of the show. The birthfather and the adoptive mother kissing....hooking up, evidently because of the shared emotions that they are experiencing regarding the baby. HELLO. That makes sense. She's a teacher at the high school and he is a high school student...senior...so maybe he is 18, maybe not. So...of course I can only imagine where this is going. She is having an inappropriate relationship with a student, will be charged and then will be declared "unfit". Then somehow the baby will miraculously be returned to the birthmother. And everyone lives happily ever after.
SIGH.
I just wish for once, just once that a TV show could depict adoption with the truth and dispell myths and stereotypes.
Some movies have done an ok job.
As much as I love Modern Family, it is pretty unlikely that a gay couple could have adopted from another country. Here in the U.S., yes. But not from Vietnam. They might have been able to adopt as a single parent and then do a second parent adoption....but otherwise no.
Glee, I used to love you. But I have a feeling a break-up might be in our future.
It's you, not me.
Ending the last show with Quinn declaring that she was going to "get her baby back. full custody" left me with my typical "really" feeling that I often have when shows and movies try to depict an adoption story line. But again, I decided I would give it a chance.
And then we had this week's episode. In which you made Quinn look like an idiot birthmother. Hiding hot sauce, baby sacrificing books and other paraphenalia around the house that was supposed to make the adoptive mother (who...by the way...is also Rachel's birthmother....but that's another story) look "unfit". Puh-lease.
But perhaps my favorite line was when Quinn told Puck (the birthfather) that she called child protective services and "they were backed up but they should have the baby back in a couple of weeks". WHA?????
What does that even mean? There are so many things wrong with that statement I don't even know where to begin! Why would child protective services take a call from a high schooler and just take her word that the adoptive mother is unfit? And even if they were going to do an investigation and find her unfit, why in the world would they place the baby back with the birthmother when she VOLUNTARILY relinquished her rights. ARRRRGGGGHHHH.
They COULD have done so much more with this on a real, in depth level. They could have explored how difficult it is to place your baby for adoption and the heartache, grief and regret that one might feel after they have made that choice. I would have been fine with that. Because it's absolutely true.
And then the kicker at the end of the show. The birthfather and the adoptive mother kissing....hooking up, evidently because of the shared emotions that they are experiencing regarding the baby. HELLO. That makes sense. She's a teacher at the high school and he is a high school student...senior...so maybe he is 18, maybe not. So...of course I can only imagine where this is going. She is having an inappropriate relationship with a student, will be charged and then will be declared "unfit". Then somehow the baby will miraculously be returned to the birthmother. And everyone lives happily ever after.
SIGH.
I just wish for once, just once that a TV show could depict adoption with the truth and dispell myths and stereotypes.
Some movies have done an ok job.
As much as I love Modern Family, it is pretty unlikely that a gay couple could have adopted from another country. Here in the U.S., yes. But not from Vietnam. They might have been able to adopt as a single parent and then do a second parent adoption....but otherwise no.
Glee, I used to love you. But I have a feeling a break-up might be in our future.
It's you, not me.
Thursday, October 27, 2011
Moving Our Cheese
I was reminded this week of the famous book "Who Moved My Cheese?" when our office switched email server providers.
People are afraid of change. Especially those that have been operating the same way for past 20 years.
Panic set in: What if I lose my contacts? What if I can't retrieve something? What if? What if?
Change is difficult. I don't dispute that. At. All. But if we remain stagnant and unwilling to change or be flexible what does that say about us?
To me, it shows a mistrust in God. Somehow we don't think that He is going to get us through this next change. Granted, changing email providers seems like a pretty small change but the changes I'm now referring to can be much bigger and many times more anxiety provoking.
Like actually moving. To a new home. We know that we want to move to a bigger home. We have outgrown our little 2 bedroom townhome and definitely need something that fits our family of four.
Ethan and Reese shouldn't have to share a room much longer and I actually wouldn't feel comfortable with them sharing a room past a certain age anyway. I feel that boys and girls have different things going on at different ages and I just don't want to go there....
I LONG for a bigger kitchen. When I have to dismantle my dish drying rack, move the toaster and the coffee maker to make room for my crock-pot it's time to move.
I LONG for a garage where I can park my car in the winter time and not have to worry about getting the huge pile of snow off of it only to discover a thick layer of ice underneath that takes 20 minutes to scrape off even with the defroster on full blast.
I LONG for a backyard and front yard to call our own. Not a patch of grass a few feet wide and long that takes about 5 minutes to mow yet still somehow can be called a "yard". Whatever.
I LONG for a room in which we can label "the playroom", where toys are actually stored and kids actually are playing in it instead of the "playroom" being our living room where we all sit, watch TV, eat, play with toys, watch Phineas and Ferb and entertain guests.
So I am ready to move our cheese. It's time. We are starting the process of figuring out financing, looking closely at numbers, saving, re-budgeting after paying off debt and spending more than we should be spending because we were just so happy to be done with our debt payments, looking at houses, finding a realtor.....and the list goes on.
We are ready to move our cheese. :-)
People are afraid of change. Especially those that have been operating the same way for past 20 years.
Panic set in: What if I lose my contacts? What if I can't retrieve something? What if? What if?
Change is difficult. I don't dispute that. At. All. But if we remain stagnant and unwilling to change or be flexible what does that say about us?
To me, it shows a mistrust in God. Somehow we don't think that He is going to get us through this next change. Granted, changing email providers seems like a pretty small change but the changes I'm now referring to can be much bigger and many times more anxiety provoking.
Like actually moving. To a new home. We know that we want to move to a bigger home. We have outgrown our little 2 bedroom townhome and definitely need something that fits our family of four.
Ethan and Reese shouldn't have to share a room much longer and I actually wouldn't feel comfortable with them sharing a room past a certain age anyway. I feel that boys and girls have different things going on at different ages and I just don't want to go there....
I LONG for a bigger kitchen. When I have to dismantle my dish drying rack, move the toaster and the coffee maker to make room for my crock-pot it's time to move.
I LONG for a garage where I can park my car in the winter time and not have to worry about getting the huge pile of snow off of it only to discover a thick layer of ice underneath that takes 20 minutes to scrape off even with the defroster on full blast.
I LONG for a backyard and front yard to call our own. Not a patch of grass a few feet wide and long that takes about 5 minutes to mow yet still somehow can be called a "yard". Whatever.
I LONG for a room in which we can label "the playroom", where toys are actually stored and kids actually are playing in it instead of the "playroom" being our living room where we all sit, watch TV, eat, play with toys, watch Phineas and Ferb and entertain guests.
So I am ready to move our cheese. It's time. We are starting the process of figuring out financing, looking closely at numbers, saving, re-budgeting after paying off debt and spending more than we should be spending because we were just so happy to be done with our debt payments, looking at houses, finding a realtor.....and the list goes on.
We are ready to move our cheese. :-)
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